the day before.

It is about 1:30 am Thursday morning. I leave today. I'm getting crunched for time.

My stuff is currently strewn across the floor of our den, far from organized. Empty suitcases are sitting in the corner of the room. The maps that I have been hastily marking up cover the coffee table with many colored markers sitting on top. In the corner of the coffee table is a white sheet of paper with a list of about 20 items that I have scribbled on it in an attempt to remember them when I wake up.

Today is going to be so exciting. I'm having breakfast with cousins in the morning. Then I'll go shopping with my list of last-minute things. When I'm done, my last hours home will be spent throwing everything that is on the floor of the den into the suitcases. Then its off to Charlotte to meet up with Elicia (another JUC student on my flight) before flying to Philly and then the day will end while I'm in the air headed toward Tel Aviv. Ah. So unreal.

Ok, well its about time for me to get some sleep, if I can.

8 days...

left of summer break.

to mark maps, to shop for next semester, to pack everything I'll need in the next three months.

to say goodbyes.

until I get on a plane headed for Tel Aviv.

Yikes. I don't know what I'm getting myself into. But I'm getting excited.

The emails from JUC are getting more frequent as the semester gets closer. Yesterday I got an email with the schedule for orientation weekend. It made me feel like I was a freshman all over again. I love it.

A photo scavenger hunt of Jerusalem? Bring it on.

The last photo scavenger hunt I did was of Oak Ridge, NC when I was in high school. (I'm pretty sure I was with Jon T., Katherine Medlin, Kyle, maybe Tyler? and I don't know who else, but on our way back to the church we recorded ourselves singing "We are the Champions," and then ended up being smoked by the other teams... We also drove all the way to the elementary school to get a picture on a playground, completely forgetting that there is a playground in the backyard of the church we started at. Oops. Good times.) Hardly the same.

Anyways, JUC sent me some maps at the beginning of the summer. They also sent a 98-page workbook with instructions on readings from the Bible with corresponding map-markings that I am supposed to complete before I arrive. And if you know me, you also know that I haven't started yet. But, like always, I plan on starting today. :)

Preparation for this trip is making me depressed that I won't be going to Taylor. That I won't be seeing my friends in two weeks. That I won't be living with them and doing all of the fun Taylor (and 1st West) traditions at the beginning of the year. That I won't see Airband. That I won't be with family for Thanksgiving.

But I've also really enjoyed preparing for this trip. The anticipation is part of the fun. Sure, I'll miss all of the great things at Taylor in the Fall, but I know that great things are in store for me in Israel.

I can't wait to meet all new people and see all new (actually, very old) places, and have completely new experiences.

A list.

This post was inspired by a recent blog I read. Thanks Amy. :)

10 things I have learned this summer, in no particular order:

1. The healthcare system. I didn't learn everything about it, but a lot more than I knew before, and enough to discuss intelligently.

2. I HATE working out. (Ok, I already knew that, but I re-learned it every time I put my running shoes on.)

3. My nephew is the cutest baby. Ever.

4. I have to apologize for talking about my Greek paper all the time. I probably should just distribute it to everyone I know so that I won't bring it up so often.

5. Praying out loud in an empty room (or car) is the best way to think through things. It also can be very emotional.

6. Philosophy is fun, but meaningless without the gospel.

7. I actually can hold a telephone conversation for longer than 15 minutes.

8. My friends are even better than I thought they were.

9. A long commute in traffic is kinda nice in the morning, but terrible on the way home.

10. I'm excited for graduation and struggle with committing to a plan for what I'll do after May of next year.

Communion. I finally get it.

This sunday I went to church with my Grandpa, and I woke up early to go to the "breaking of bread" service. The majority of this time from 9 - 10 is spent in silence, with an occasional hymn request or word of encouragement from someone in the congregation. It is a great time to hear what God is teaching others and the silence is refreshing. So often churches are focused on the order of worship that we don't leave any time for individual prayer or contemplation.

Anyways, this service always ends with taking communion. As I took the bread and the cup, I thought about what I wrote in the previous blog entry, and I think I finally understand why communion is so important. Before this, I had felt that communion was just a tradition that we keep, more like a ritual than anything else. However, now that I have begun to realize the significance of knowing nothing but Christ and him crucified, I am beginning to comprehend why Christ would establish a tradition of remembering his death. Communion is way to ensure that we don't lose sight of the sacrifice Christ made for us. Its not just about remembering what happened, its also about visibly displaying the central belief of the church. Now that I understand this, communion is something I will definitely look for when I am looking for a church home in the future. A church that brings out bread and juice as a reminder of the death of Christ is less likely to water-down the gospel, as I'm afraid many churches have begun to do.

Philosophy and Faith.

Recently I have been thinking a lot about two things I love: my faith and my philosophy. The internship that I have been involved with for the past five weeks has challenged me in many ways, the most significant being how much I value these and which I value more.

Now, if you're a Christian and you're reading this, then you're probably aware that if the two were presented in a Sunday School class the obvious answer is that faith is more important. While this may seem obvious in Sunday School, it is far from obvious in my life. These past five weeks I have realized how important it is to me that I sound philosophical and that I present my beliefs and understanding of the world in persuasive ways so that anyone who hears me does not judge me as unintelligent. 

Well, this past week my pride in philosophy became even clearer to me, and I am horrified. As someone in my old youth group used to put it, I was "God-smacked".

If you don't know me, I'm a philosophy major and have been considering going to graduate school in philosophy. After this week, I've lost most of that interest. Here's why.

I re-read one of my favorite passages in the Bible: 1 Cor. 1-2. 

And I, when I came to you, brothers, did not come proclaiming to you the testimony of God with lofty speech or wisdom. For I decided to know nothing among you except Jesus Christ and him crucified.And I was with you in weakness and in fear and much trembling, and my speech and my message were not in plausible words of wisdom, but in demonstration of the Spirit and of power, that your faith might not rest in the wisdom of men but in the power of God. 1 Cor. 2:1-5

After reading this I was immediately convicted of my desire to speak "plausible words of wisdom" instead of Christ and him crucified. I get so wrapped up in making sure that my intelligence isn't questioned, that I lose sight of the only truth that I need to know, which is Christ's sacrifice.

So, like Paul, I have resolved to know nothing except Christ and him crucified. I no longer want to debate issues that are irrelevant to this truth. Wisdom doesn't come from man's intellect, but from God. I choose to reject the wisdom of men, because I already have the mind of Christ. (1 Cor. 2:16)

Happy Father's Day!

This is a not-so-flattering picture of my dad and I. :)

So today is Father's Day and I couldn't be more thankful for my dad. He has made it clear that family is a priority. My dad spends most of his time, energy and money (a lot of money) for his children. He has also taken his marriage and responsibility as a father very seriously. More importantly, he has taken his faith seriously and has demonstrated what it looks like to be a follower of Christ. Thanks dad.

Today at church I couldn't help but think that as much and often as I should thank my dad for caring and providing for me I need to thank God all the more. By accepting Christ as Savior, I am called a child of God. I can relate to God as my Father. He claims me as His daughter and has even granted me an inheritance. In fact, I am a co-heir with Christ. I am not sure it is possible to thank God enough for what he has given and sacrificed for me. I'm not even sure I can even comprehend it. However, I am sure that his grace is sufficient for me, and his power is made perfect in my weakness.

The beginning of summer.

Summer. What a wonderful thing.

Its only been two weeks, but I have high hopes for this summer.

I had the opportunity to spend the first three days of summer with my whole family. That's right, folks. All 9 of us. The following Monday I turned 20. Tuesday I watched my brother get in a motorcycle accident and cried like a baby in front of the police officer. (Kyle's fine by the way). The whole next week was spent rushing to get my online course done and turned in. The night that I got my Logic submitted, my cousin called me and informed me that she was ENGAGED! I ran down the stairs and drove to her house, despite the fact that it was 11pm and she lives half-an-hour away. I am so excited for her, but so sad that I won't be at her wedding in the Fall.

I've been sick the past few days, but I'm feeling much better and expect to get things done before I pack and leave for Chicago on Tuesday.

Stay tuned for details on my internship.